I have been sitting with the word ACTIVE for longer than I should have. The problem with the word ACTIVE in the context of what I think I am looking at is that it does not resolve into a comfortable category. Active documentation subject. Active monitoring priority. Active threat assessment. Active — as opposed to closed, suspended, dormant, or terminated. Each alternative means something different about what is happening and what the progression looks like.

The thing I keep coming back to is the timing. The entry I believe corresponds to ACTIVE predates the first occurrence I documented. That means I was listed before I started documenting. The documentation did not create the record. The record predates the documentation. Whatever I am on a list of, I was put there before I understood there was a list.

I have been trying to think about whether documenting this changes anything. The honest answer is that it does not change the status. The status is the status. What documentation does is create a parallel record — one that exists outside of their system, in a form they did not author, that they cannot edit. The STATUS column says ACTIVE. This documentation says: I know it says ACTIVE. I know it said ACTIVE before I started watching. I am watching now. Whatever ACTIVE implies for their process, my process is also active. Both records will persist.